January 17, 2010

the nervous system

736 days into our marriage and Bryan says to me at dinner last night:

"I didn't know you were such a nervous person when we got married."

I stopped tearing my napkin into tiny pieces, fanned myself, wiped the sweat off of my brow, swallowed the vomit that was coming up and said:

"I didn't know you were fat."

He's not fat, I just didn't know how to recover from that situation. Thankfully, I had some Xanax in my purse and a small bottle of wine. I think that the rest of the night was fun, I just can't remember. It's my nerves.

3 comments:

Bridget said...

you're hysterical.

Cheroylie said...

hahahahahahahaha

Macy Dawn said...

I am creepily stalking through all your past posts...this one just got me! I am enjoying stalking you.

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